Over the last week, I have been thinking a lot about my word for 2012 – THRIVE. As the week has progressed, I have become increasingly sad and frustrated; well, really I have descended into the bottomless pit of self pity and despair. After all, the universe promised me that I would thrive in 2012 and we are almost a quarter into the year. When is “thrive” going to happen? I AM WAITING AND I AM READY.
For the first time in 15 years, I have time to write; and, I love to write. Journaling connects me with the best part of myself. I have time to play with art, and have found that combining paint, paper and glue into meaningful designs gives me tremendous joy. I have time to be both emotionally and physically available to my family members, the people who mean the most to me.
Before I left my job last July, I thought I was pretty squared away. Since then, I have had to come to terms with the reality that I still have some growing to do. I hate change. I like to know where I am going, to be in control. I have authority issues; and, I don’t like confrontation. I don’t like to need others; and, I HATE TO ASK FOR HELP. I am having the opportunity to work on these issues. J